Pornography's Impact on Sex: Interview with the DailyMail

In March 2025, Ziphealth – an online pharmacy providing access to prescription medications – published the results of a survey of 1,000 American women which showed that 78% of women have had a sexual partner with performance anxiety and 48% blame themselves for that anxiety. While we are unsure of the details and methods of that study, the numbers seem somehow both plausible and extreme. Troublingly, they also found that nearly 20% of women who spoke to their partner about the issue walked away from the conversation feeling gaslit, and 21% started avoiding sex altogether to avoid the problem.

These are worrying statistics. Sex is an important part of a relationship and if difficulties cannot be discussed, then there may be a deeper problem in the relationship. Olivia Salamone of the Daily Mail reached out to couples therapists and dating experts to discuss psychological factors that could be contributing to this problem. In “Dating experts reveal just how much of a role your mental state plays in the bedroom” founder and clinical director of Madison Park Psychotherapy, Jordan Conrad, explains that popular media in general and pornography in particular are partially responsible.

"Many men are frankly inundated with sexual imagery and suggestion, from advertisements to movies to online pornography. These media often portray women in passive, servile roles, not just ready but eager for sex.” The obvious problem with this is that many men unconsciously come to expect that women are either “eager” for sex or not interested at all. However, the reality of romantic relationships is much different. “Even a very sexual partner won't always want to have sex and when they do, they generally won't want to focus on you to their own exclusion and will require you to actually participate in the process.”

Pornography has also become increasingly extreme, Jordan says, which can shape the sexual interests of many men: “Online pornography, which is now readily available to anyone at any time, is also increasingly tailored to the male experience and increasingly extreme. The combination of ubiquitous sexualized messaging and unfettered access to pornography means that more men are masturbating more frequently and becoming more accustomed to a diversity of visual stimuli all of which is tailored for a male audience.”

As terrible as this is, the most dismaying aspect to this from a psychotherapeutic perspective is the difficulty couples are having just talking about these issues. The article doesn’t spend much time on the subject, but if couples feel uneasy talking to each other about sexual issues, then the relationship is in trouble. Couples counseling is an ideal and effective way to combat performance anxiety and address sexual difficulties.